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Location: Fort Lauderdale, Florida, United States
Interests: You will find out through my entries.
Expertise: Saying how I feel.
Message: message me
|Right now I am really trying to calm down. I am seeing how social media is really affecting a relationship. Now don't get me wrong I can't get mad for shit that is posted because by all means it is how people feel. I get that, but once there is information in there that is not true about me of course I am entitled to feel some type of way correct?? Apparently, I don't know how to protect myself, I am a liar, I don't know how to listen and I'm a deceiver. Supposedly, I caused this....ok, I'll take that. I am paying for my consequences. I'm just going to leave it at that. It is pointless to keep going over this. The past is the past. That is something I can't change. I'm done. I'm distracted. |
I'm having a baby with someone who doesn't trust me. Funny on my way home I was thinking *God forbid* if something happened to the baby would we still be together?? Would we still move in together?? #deepthought ((since that's what everyone is doing today)).
|I have a headache & I'm nauseous!! GRRRR. I want to sleep. Stupid lesson plans. Just kill me now please!! Today was so much fun & it felt amazing till I had to come home n face these stupid fucking lesson plans!! FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK ME SIDEWAYS!!! |
I went back on my posts n I have noticed that I only come on here to complain about my lesson plans. Maybe one or two other things but just my lesson plans.....
STUPID SHIT FACE.
Don't mind my random outbursts. I really don't know what's going on with me right now. I don't feel quite right, but oh well.
|So I have been trying to do my lesson plans all damn day!! Still working on the same one since this morning. :( FML!!|
Ughhhh so much work to do.....I am such a procrastinator.
Why do I do this ALL the damn time?!?!
Ok, I'm done complaining.
For today of course.
|I can't remember important shit. I mess up everything. Whatever. I am just having a difficult time today. I guess tomorrow.....*sigh* I'm working through my fucking emotions. STUPID FUCK FACE!!|
I feel like Naomi is all brand new. I can't access anything on her. She runs stupid slow and sometimes doesn't even load all the websites. I don't understand. I don't know any of my passwords, I keep getting them wrong. Before break I was supposed to upload something for work, and of course I waited till the last minute to do it. Now that I want to be productive and do it, everything just wants to be counterproductive. STORY OF MY LIFE. Oh just fuck me sideways....
I'm sick. I want to go back to sleep. Wish i had someone to just hold me. I'm so disappointed in myself but I am not doing anything to change it so whatever. This suck. I suck.
|I'm supposed to be working on my lesson plans because I am supposed to have week 19 & 20 done already. I am supposed to have done a lot of stuff for work. My life just conveniently fell apart two weeks before school let out. I am supposed to be a teacher. WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND MADE ME A TEACHER?? I am failing these kids because I don't know what I am doing?? Why am I their teacher?? Why do I fail at life so much?? What am I doing with myself?? How do I ask for help?? What am I doing wrong?? I am alone, so I am having plenty of time to think/reflect/do this bullshit...but I'm not doing what I am supposed to be doing. Why?? I did this to myself. I didn't listen in church. I am not a good samaritan. I'm wasting time!! I hate myself right now. I'm fucking ugly. My hair isn't done, my toes are busted. I am just a fucking mess right now. Oh man, there was baby found dead in someone's backyard. What is going on?? This text message I just got......OMG?!?!|
I can't control what happens this year, God knows what he will put me through. I will not hope for the best because I will get whatever I am dealt. I will handle myself accordingly. I'm such a fuck up.